The Amazing Spider-Man 2 is a really good movie. It has its cheesy moments and its better moments but overall if I were to waste $45 seeing this in IMAX HD 3D with leather reclining ass-heating seats, I wouldn’t be pissed. I like that this film had the same feel Sam Raimi’s Spider-Man 2 had, you know that Spidey will be up against more motherfuckers and yet somehow his personal life suffers because of it. What I liked better about this incarnation is that Peter suffers more after pretty much everyone around him dies in a matter of two films. Once again Oscorp is the source of all the evil shit going down in NYC. Jamie Foxx, who has a knack for playing oddballs, is an insecure nerd (Max Dillon[second time he uses Max in a film with the first to my knowledge being in the legendary film Collateral]) who after some freak accident becomes fake Mr. Freeze (Electro). I couldn’t quite figure out what purpose this motherfucker served as a villain except that his pent up anger fuels his electric blasts and knocks out everything around him. First battle is in Times Square, only because a glowing blue man walked around New York in a hoodie with no one noticing. Even as a freak, no one cared about Max, fucking brilliant considering the same applied to Max in Collateral (there’s yet hope in Hollywood when things like this happen). Peter after talking with Gwen again notices this shit from afar and dons the suit. This is where the complete bullshit begins…Gwen managed to make her way to Times Square, push past throngs of on-lookers and be in the middle of a highly dangerous fight involving a thing that could shock you to death. Spidey subdues Electro and Gwen casually walks up to Spider-Man afterwards, naturally. Let a bitch ever try to sneak up on Batman or Wolverine. We learn that Harry has the green disease passed on to him from now dead dad and his company’s board is working behind his back to frame him as well as cover up their dirty business and dirtier past. Now emo Harry vows to get Spider-Man’s blood to aid him in avoiding death. Honestly the rest was mostly a blur because I made the wise choice of watching this at 4 AM after working a 13 hour shift at GameStop. Let’s get to the good shit. Electro and Harry team up to take down Spider-Man and Gwen and Spidey figure out a way to take down Electro. Mega battle occurs by some power grid but fuck all of that shit. GWEN’S HAND IS WEB-CUMMED TO THE HOOD OF A COP CAR. SHE CUTS OFF SPIDER CUM, STEALS A COP CAR AND DRIVES THROUGH A FUCKING BLACKOUT AMONGST GRIDLOCK AND PANDEMONIUM TO JUST CASUALLY APPROACH SPIDER-MAN AND BLACK BLUE-MAN GROUP AMBASSADOR IN THE MIDDLE OF ONE OF THE BIGGEST FIGHTS EVER. FUCK YOU HOLLYWOOD. AT LEAST MAKE SOME OF THIS PLAUSIBLE. So yeah, Gwen goes inside to set up Electro charging himself into oblivion but here comes Green Goblin (Harry looking like a drug addict ). GG takes Gwen and my favorite part of the film happens. He drops her, she avoids dying, Spider-Man kicks Goblin’s ass and Gwen falls again only so Spider-Man can catch her but she hits her head and dies. Lmao, lmao, lmao, lmao, lmao. At least she didn’t come back from the fires of hell like Tony Stark’s lady and kill off Harry. As film ends, Harry’s healing from his wounds and the biggest cocktease ever occurs (fuck you Sony). Spider-Man cries about Gwen for months only to be inspired by her graduation speech to kick ass again. RHINO emerges to kick ass and somehow a fucking kid stops him in his tracks. Spider-Man talks with kid and the entire time Rhino never thought to kill both right there. Spider-Man and Rhino begin to fight and hopefully by third film Marvel gives me the Sinister Six trying to fuck up Spider-Man.
Other notables from film:
- A secret subway platform housing a secret train that serves as pretty much a better working space than most skyscrapers would in Manhattan.
- Ryan from The Office as Electro’s boss.
- A seemingly indestructible laptop during Peter’s parents demise on falling plane which on top of that has amazing wireless connectivity.
- Spider-Man with one web-shooter doing more to save people in danger(in Times Square no less) than the entire NYPD.
This review could have been more detailed, I spoiled nothing since film has already released and my body is now even more ready for X-Men and the almighty fucking Godzilla(that will be worth every penny in IMAX 3D).